Pushing Through

Today seemed like it was going to be hard. Work made me come in early and fun made me stay up late. All this adds up to a very sleepy me. I'm writing this and counting down the minutes until I can get home for a nap. I neeeeeed one. Anyway, because of this I was very unhappy about getting out on the road. I battled this by simply putting my head down and pushing through. It seemed like the run was slow, but oddly enough, it was just about the same time as always. I guess that was just a phantom of my crappy feeling. It ended up going well, but I'm fricken tired now.

Resolved: The thought of doing something is often harder then actually doing something.

Seriously. I thought for sure I would dread this run. But, honestly, it went quite well and I finished feeling good. So, in the future when I'm feeling like I shouldn't or don't want to do something, just do it. Nike the bitch and I guarantee in the end it won't be as bad as you thought it would. Something for me to remember on those long, hot, Summer days.

Last evening I was speaking to the wif about my chip idea. I had the idea that people are often rewarded with chips for kicking a bad habit. AA gives out their chips, rehab clinics do, so why not give myself for successfully CREATING  a healthy habit? Makes sense to me. I told my dear wif this idea and was a bit surprised by her response. She said it was a good idea, but didn't want to be punished for failing. I.E. If she didn't succeed on her goals, it would be a punishment not to get the reward. I never looked at it this way. Seems strange in fact. After all, I'm trying to create a life change here, in the same vein addicts have to change their lives. They don't create this change for the chip, the chip is a reminder of what you want to achieve. Looking at it the other way seems counter productive to me. What do you think?

This got us into a discussion of the difference between "excuse" and "reason", which to me, mean the same thing. She believes excuse has a negative connotation to it, which I can understand, but disagree with in principal. I refuse to allow a reason or excuse to stop me from my goal. It's such a seemingly small goal, in the grand scheme of things, but one that can fundamentally change who I am. One I want to achieve. One I will achieve.

Time out: 1235   Time In: 1304
Distance: 2.85
Walks: 2, Inhaler Use: 3
Distractions: Plus One Per Diem on SIR